My name is Heidi Faith, and I am the founder of stillbirthday.
Many of the visitors, mentors, Love Cupboard coordinators, doulas, and other team members have been with stillbirthday since we began, on August 1, 2011, or shortly after.
But, so many of the incredible, courageous, warrior members of the stillbirthday family and community are new – finding us and meeting us here each and every day.
I want to come alongside you.
If you have a question you’d like to ask me directly, you can email at any time, Heidi.Faith@stillbirthday.info.
As part of community, it can be kind of special to open up our community even further with a kind of “letter to the editor.” There can be some really tough questions in birth and bereavement, and it might feel validating to see if someone has asked a similar question to the one you might have been wondering.
I ask that questions are respectful, that those who ask questions understand that your question may be edited or unpublished if it is disrespectful or unloving, and that time is given to publish (if it’s your first posting) and respond, as I also am an active member of the stillbirthday community both locally and globally. And in return, I will do my part to answer questions as thoughtfully and as transparently as I find myself able. And while you’re here, you can leave a little note about yourself – it can be totally random, silly, or brave. What’s your favorite color? Favorite movie? Favorite reason to laugh?
I hope this can be a wonderful time of connecting and growing together!
With love,
Heidi Faith
Hi! My question is about how long it took you after you lost your child to feel like you were fully functioning again? I lost my daughter,Maddy, at 35 weeks on December 31st because her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. I am frustrated by the fog that I’m in. It takes me for.ev.er to complete simple tasks. I teach first grade, but am finding it hard to teach due to how distracted I am. If anyone has any tips on how to “get back into life” I’d love to hear them!
Pink! My favorite color is pink.
And my favorite Heidi is Faith. <3
Mindy,
I’m sorry for your incredible loss, and your pain, that you feel every single day. I lost my precious Fiona Grace at 35.5 weeks, on August 25, 2014. Except, there were no answers for us, even after the autopsy and genetic testing….I had a normal healthy pregnancy up until we lost her. I can relate to you about the fog….I also felt a numbness at times, mixed with the deep sadness, and lots of anger. I stopped needing Tylenol PM or alcohol to sleep after 4 months passed. Now, after 6 months, I’m much less foggy, less distracted, I no longer feel the need to revisit those unbearable memories of seeing that dreadful ultrasound, or letting the guilt I feel tear me apart. Making an album of the photos we have of her was very therapeutic for me, lighting a special candle in her memory, whenever I feel like it, makes me feel better. Praying with her big sister at night and talking about her, makes it better, not all better….but enough to continue moving on. I take care of myself as best as I can, to make sure I have enough energy for every new grieving day I have to live on earth without her. Vitamins, exercise, sleep, good food, family time, and time with friends. Talk about your feelings, and if you need to pay someone to do that, go ahead. I saw a counselor twice, and would like to go again. Two nights ago I broke down in the middle of the night again. It was a night that my husband and I had a disagreement…I felt unloved, not supported, and broken. We bereaved Mom’s are survivors of a devastating tragedy. We are strong, but only after we pick up the pieces of our broken hearts, day after day, after day. Our sweet angel babies know that we love them. Thinking of you right now. Sending a warm hug and love your way. We will light our angel candle tonight for our Fiona and her heavenly friend, Maddy. -Becca
My favorite color is green <3