Subsequent Birth Planning // The SBD® Doula

Stillbirthday provides resources and birth plans for every miscarriage and stillbirth experience.

Getting pregnant again after you’ve endured pregnancy & infant loss is often referred to as a “rainbow pregnancy”. A “rainbow birth” might also be one in which a surviving multiple is born.

Here at stillbirthday, we know that there are five seasons a family needs support through:

Pregnancy/Prior to Birth
Birth
The Welcoming
The Farewell
Healing Journey

While on your healing journey, you may become pregnant again. And this “subsequent/rainbow” pregnancy does not forfeit your grief. In fact, it can bring additional joys – and, additional fears, worries and hurts.

Pregnant Again

If you are “pregnant again”, here is some birth planning information for your “subsequent/rainbow” pregnancy and birth:

Please read our information on emotional support during a “subsequent/rainbow” pregnancy.

Consider having a special blessingway.

You’re invited to explore how stillbirthday Supports Birth Diversity.

Please join us at our sister website, run by our doulas, at www.stillbirthday.info.

Subsequent Birth Plan

1. Including Plan Definitions, Expectations & Alternatives

What do the options you are considering for this birth mean to you? How are they influenced by your motherhood journey thus far? What will it mean to you if your options change during the course of your labor? How might the sensations of labor, birth and the Welcoming be similar or different from your last encounter with these experiences? Consulting with experts, professionals and loved ones of a variety of perspectives might seem intimidating and frustrating, but can prove to give you some great insight into the possibilities and the reasons for your choices.
Creating a pre-planning journal can be a tremendous tool. This journal might include Love Letters to your baby who is not alive, it might include Love Letters to your baby you are pregnant with, and it might include thoughts you have along the way. Returning to your writing at a later time can help refreshen your perspective.
There are many non-medical options that can be personal and wonderful for you – options that may either replace or work in conjunction to medical support, including your SBD doula. If you are planning a home rainbow birth, stillbirthday mothers invite you to read about their experiences, which include extremely important things to consider, challenges you may face, and healing you may encounter. A beautiful book entitled Dancing with the Midwives or another powerful book, Ghost Belly, may be worth investing. The author of Dancing talks about her hospital stillbirth and her home subsequent birth.
With the help of trusted friends who can parallel our birth plans for you, you can utilize any of our birth plans for your living subsequent pregnancy and birth, including our Cesarean birth plan for multiples in which one or more multiple will be born alive. There are so many wonderful, personal touches you can make in even the most medically involved birth.
Again, our information on emotional support during a “subsequent/rainbow” pregnancy can prove tremendously helpful.
This mother and newly adopted baby below, are bonding in a “recreated” waterbirth experience (click here for their story). It is never too late to facilitate bonding, even when birth plans include the most amount of medical intervention. Your love and your creativity can create an experience of love that is deeply meaningful and personal.

2. Including Support

Consider hiring a Stillbirthday Birth & Bereavement Doula. This list includes SBD doulas and other birth professionals. SBD doulas do not only provide support for miscarriage and stillbirth, but SBD doulas are trained to provide support in all birth situations and experiences, including live births and including “subsequent/rainbow” births.
Learning a bit about what we call “rainbow fatigue” can be helpful, which can carry some of the same traits as “baby blues”.

3. Including Siblings

You might include a symbol or a keepsake that represents your baby(ies) who died. You can visit our Claim the Space and our Still Together sections for keepsake/representing ideas.

4. Including Symbols

You might include rainbows somehow into the birth setting: order a stillbirthday exclusive rainbow milk teether with special engraving! A rainbow colored receiving blanket, newborn hat, ink prints, leg warmers, onesie, wrap/carrier or other items. A rainbow on your birthing door can be a symbol to your birth team that there may be heightened moments of fear or dystocia during the labor, along with the possibility of heightened joy at birth.

5. Including stillbirthday

You can share your birth story here at stillbirthday, as encouragement for other stillbirthday mothers. We have a section of writings entitled “Getting Pregnant Again“- which holds the reality of loss, life, hopes and fears in subsequent pregnancies, as well as our Rainbow Birth stories.