Certified Birth & Bereavement Doula® serving in the United Kingdom
Email: PetraHoehfurtner.SBD@stillbirthday.info
Visit Petra’s website
Petra Hoehfurtner, SBD
April 1, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Bereaved Dolphin
March 30, 2013 by Leave a Comment
A dolphin at Dana Point was seen carrying her deceased baby dolphin on her back as she swam through the waters. Other dolphins followed near her.
There is a more in-depth article, including quotes from the Captain who filmed this sacred footage, here.
This is a powerful and {graphic} visual demonstration of a parent’s love.
Yes, even the creatures of the sea are breaking the silence.
Beata Pryszcz, SBD
March 30, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Certified Birth & Bereavement Doula® serving in Illinois
Email: BeataPryszcz.SBD@stillbirthday.info
Beata provides direct support to families in the Chicagoland, and is bi-lingual, providing support to Polish speaking families. She also provides support via email to families enduring pregnancy and infant loss in Poland.
A Hurting Faith
March 30, 2013 by 2 Comments
When I was a little girl, I was raised in “the system”.
I lived in foster homes and orphanages.
At 15 I aged out of the system, started working, and got an apartment with a couple of friends.
As a young adult, it was during my pregnancy with my first child, I became a Christian.
And once that happened, I was able to see a slow but sure progression of change that led me to the most wonderful place in my life.
My testimony was simple: accepting Christ can begin a slow, but sure, progression of joy.
And then my baby died.
And a doctor called him “debris”.
And people told me it was my fault.
And I felt like it was my fault.
And I had to tell my Love, my husband, my best friend, that his child was dead inside of me.
The crisis of faith,
The crisis of identity,
has been, at times, entirely overwhelming.
My baby was born via miscarriage during the “Easter season” and it wasn’t very long after, that people started gossiping about another Rapture hoax.
Easter, for the Christian, is the hope that, when we die, we get to go to Heaven, because Jesus did.
For the newly bereaved me, though, it was a cruel joke.
It was one more thing to haunt me.
Why, God?
Let me be punished for my own sins.
Why did my child have to die?
Why does my husband have to be the father of a deceased baby?
And why do we have to wait to be reunited?
I know I’m a sinner.
Can’t you leave them out of this?
The guilt and the pain have, at times, been entirely unbearable.
We have wonderfully informative and even inspiring devotionals here at stillbirthday for families trying to make biblical sense of pregnancy and infant loss, many of which I’ve written myself. In fact, we have amazing resources for families of all faith and culture backgrounds, to help you rediscover the treasure of your heritage.
But today, right now, I just want to pause.
I want to authentically, transparently say,
If you feel your faith has been wounded,
that you just can’t quite catch back up to the joy or even the certainty in your faith that you once had,
You aren’t alone.
Get Mentioned in a Real Movie!
March 27, 2013 by 7 Comments
Stillbirthday, in a special arrangement with Return to Zero producer Sean Hanish, is presenting you with an opportunity to have your baby(ies) name listed in the movie.
In an exclusive section to appear BEFORE the other credits, the film will read:
This film was made possible through the generous donations of StillBirthday Families
Immediately below this line, will list the names of OUR BABIES!
This is a very exclusive, very special, once in a lifetime opportunity. This is a special prominant section of the credits and will be highly visible!
There are additional things as part of this package, which stillbirthday decided to give away (these are now closed)
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Digital Download (claimed)
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Seah Hanish’s short films and desktop image from the film (claimed)
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The film shooting script (claimed)
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Soundtrack to the film (claimed)
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One, $500 Limited Edition poster for the film, signed by the cast and director (claimed)
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Cast & crew screening of RETURN TO ZERO and the after-party in Los Angeles*. From Sean, “This is a great way to get your name attached to a great feature-length film, build your IMDb resume, and schmooze with the cast and crew of the film. (***Does Not Include Travel/Lodging*** Estimated delivery: Feb 2014 Add $50 to ship outside the US).”
Thank you, for spreading the stillbirthday message that zeroes count, by joining in this opportunity to be a part of Return to Zero!
Babies’ Names
In the film credits, these read in alphabetical order
Daphne Grace Daggett, Sophie Abigail Moddison, Ezra James Saffeels
Alexandra Margaret Holper (plus 1 ticket to the cast & crew screening of RETURN TO ZERO and the after-party in Los Angeles*)
Aiden Robert Roth, Jeremiah Oliver Roth (plus soundtrack above)
Aria Grace Helen Michael (8 contributers)
Baby Matthews
Grady Joseph Hertweck
Jaimison Henry Smith (4 contributers)
Harlow Marie Redmond
Boston Christine Neeb
Sawyer Erik Williams
Zoe Elizabeth Wood, Addie Kate Wood
Matilda Lauren
Jonathan Anthony Papik
Luke Donavan Irvin, Conner Ryan Irvin
Gabriel Green (2 contributors) (and script)
Julian Rafael Rodriguez (and digital download)
Jaxon Patrick Matulka (and short films)
Kendal Lizares
Makenna Allene Duff
Judah Jubilee Young, Gideon Young, Deborah Young ,Isaac Young, Naomi Young, Jeremiah Young, Hope Young, Caleb Young, Joseph Young, Gabriel Christian Young, Isaiah Rae Young (2 contributors) (plus 1 ticket to the cast & crew screening of RETURN TO ZERO and the after-party in Los Angeles* and poster)
Cole Morgan Hatfield (plus 1 ticket to the cast & crew screening of RETURN TO ZERO and the after-party in Los Angeles*)
Aurelius James Ernest, Stella Aurelia
Sarah-Jane Kettewell
Maisie Renee Phegley
Caden Matthew Davis
Nash Austin Wheeler
Kailee Lynn Bellanger
Arianna Lynn Sparwasser, Brooke Elizebeth Geasey
Evelyn Marie Kunkel
Christopher Mac Ray, Tia Nicole Lynn, Eric Michael Edward
Morgyn Marie Veneklasen, Prestyn Alan Veneklasen
Isaac Brigham Nielson, Nielson Babies
Angelica Nye
Peyton Mark DeGeorge (plus 1 ticket to the cast & crew screening of RETURN TO ZERO and the after-party in Los Angeles*)
Ruthie Lou Lands
Grae Lingo
Pippa Gracie May
Myles Robert-Clifford Scott
Sienna Jeane Rubenstein
Timothy William Purdy Jr
William Carter Duffy
Kylie Nicole Helton
Titan John Harmon
Harper Grace Leach
Stephanie Joanna Schmaltz
Aiden Joshua
Zachary Bryan Spray
Grayson V Schratwieser
Payton Marie Johann, Anderson Chris Johann
Calan Chelton, Anduril Chelton
Caedmon Thies, Niahm Thies, Joyous Thies
Michael Rae Coronado
Peyton Grace McFadin
Levi Burt
Mackenzie Pearl Boggs
Alissa Samantha Soolayman
Lia Joy Mitchell & Siblings
Wyatt Kasey McCauley
Baby Cramer
Isaiah Christopher Ross
Landon James Richards
Baby Leighty
Jillian Rose Lee
June Lee Monte
Sophie Elizabeth Goodwin
Gabriel Sloan Franini
Baby Maureen Anne
Josiah Alan Kaminsky
Nathaniel Blake Jacquinot
Andrew Joseph Hefner, John Gerard Hefner
Kaidynn June Colburn
Carleigh McKenna Haas, Leah Faith Motter, Jordan Leigh Haas
Carter Cooper Barry
Lily Katherine Allen-Ball
Sydney Adriana Mohney
George Patrick Andrew Corr
Tossie Adaline Hill
Christopher Michael Hathaway
Josiah Craig Beimert
Corbin Walker Caruthers
Lily Isherwood-Connor
Samuel Evan Fredrickson
Noah Alexander Porsche
Colton Batchelor
Isla Michaela Johnston
Noah Scott Koning, Joanna Claire Koning, Emilie Alyse Koning
Joshie Curtiss
Ethan Charles Donaldson
Josiah Eugene Wilson
Christiana Karafantis
Steven Michael Toothe
Hannah Katherine Larsen
Shopping for Adoption
March 27, 2013 by Leave a Comment
When someone says, “well at least you can just adopt” they are, intentionally or not, sending the message that one can simply run to WalMart and pick out a baby.
It’s not that simple.
Adoption can be a difficult and emotional process, for all involved: for the pregnant mother, for the intending parents, and for the baby.
Each person deserves to be supported, and supported well.
Our SBD Doulas have knowledge and resources available to them in their training to help support families considering adoption, including in particular, the element of bereavement that might accompany the desire to adopt from the intending family, and the subsequent bereavement that the pregnant mother may feel after the adoption transition.
In recent news, a pregnant teen girl was kidnapped and forced to drive her car to the location of the intending parents. The kidnapper has been arrested, and the reports indicate that the pregnant mother is safe, after intentionally crashing the car into a parked police car, which is how the kidnapper was caught and the situation came into the news.
Grief is real.
I speak only for myself when I say that, I know that there are those within my own “demographic” of Christian conservatives, who approach their position in what I can only say a sloppy way. Adoption itself is no quick fix to anything. It requires excellent support, for everyone involved.
Additionally, our country is currently seeing a lot of homosexual marriage controversy. Homosexual couples looking into adoption face potential rejection from assisted reproductive clinics, and potential issues regarding Second Parent Adoption.
I’m not asking you what your views are on adoption in general, as an alternative to elective abortion, or homosexual partners adopting.
I’m simply sharing with you, that couples yearning to feel like parents just can’t go shopping for adoption like you might think.
Related:
- See what SBD Doulas learn
- Find an SBD Doula
- Fertility Support/Options
- Grief Support Resources
- She’s Not My Rainbow
Summer 2013 Must-Have
March 25, 2013 by Leave a Comment
2013 marks 25 years of official Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness since President Ronald Reagan signed Proclamation 5890.
Bereavement is just plain hard, isn’t it?
Is it possible at all, that we bereaved mothers can don something that is representative of our children, of our motherhood, of our bereavement, and still have it be….fashionable?
Still have it be…dare I say…sexy?
Life after loss challenges everything – including how we feel about our bodies and about our sexuality.
I believe that, for the bereaved mother who is also a wee bit daring, the Awareness belly ring could prove to be a wonderful addition to her summer attire.
I’ve got one, and I love it! It’s a precious feeling, decorating my belly, my outer womb, with something so symbolic.
Are you signed up for our newsletter? Because we’ll be giving one away for free in the May issue of the SBD Newsletter!
Plans for Judah
March 23, 2013 by Leave a Comment
Told by: Coral
I found out I was pregnant for my third child in October 2012.
Already having had 2 very healthy pregnancies, I never dreamed that this pregnancy wouldn’t end as happily as the other two.
When I went in for a routine ultra-sound at almost 21 weeks pregnant on February 6, 2013, my baby boy no longer had a heartbeat.
Five weeks later, I find myself mostly back to normal emotionally, but occasionally still having overwhelming moments of sadness and tears.
The hardest part for me right now is that I feel like I’m the only one who can and will remember him. I had planned to name him Judah.
